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If TikTwat ‘Influencers’ Had Valley Girl IQs…(with audio)

If TikTwat "influencers" had higher (AKA Valley Girl) IQs, the world would be totally rad. Instead, it sucks the big one.

Let's take a moment to psychoanalyze the mind of a fictitious TikTwat Gen-Z celeb who left scathing reviews for everything she encountered for the day (as interpreted and perceived by a Valley Girl teleported from the 1980s).

I saw a deceptive ad, for like, a service. And, that's like predatory. LOOK AT MY NAILS. LOOK AT MY NAILS. LOOK AT MY NAILS. 

If I'm going to use my parents' money at the online Gallaria for therapy, I better get my PRESCRIPTIONS filled!!! OMG. I have, like, attention deficit and anxiety because I'm not getting enough upvotes and likes. And, I can't remember what I experienced due to repression and oppression.

Of, like, my feelings.

I'm going to get attention by complaining on TikTwat about my victimization.

And, also, there's the student loan debt. And, like, better jobs, dude, because TikTwat doesn't pay enough.

For sure. I heard about a person who let "their" parents take out student loans to pay for "their" college -- and "they" didn't even finish. And, now "they" have to deal with, like, dirty looks from "their" judgmental parents. Take a chill pill. […]

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